For Immediate Release
Contact: Linda Gage, VP Marketing/Media Relations
Eagle’s Nest Publications,LLC
Phone: 864-329-0530
Email: pressroom@bellsouth.net
Credit card statements for restaurants you’ve never been to. Phone bills with unexplained long-distance calls. Trips to “the barber” that take…hours? The signs may be subtle or suddenly knock you over with the realization that your partner or husband could be cheating on you. What do you do now? Find out for sure! Bill Mitchell’s new book, The More You Know--Getting the Evidence and Support You Need to Investigate a Troubled Relationship is a supportive, step-by-step guide that could save your marriage.
“If you suspect, even just a little,” says Mitchell, “that your partner or husband may be cheating on you, you’re living a life of doubt and suspicion that can eat away at you. Any form of adultery puts your life on hold and your finances at risk. You owe it to yourself to find out for sure.”
Mitchell, the “7-Day Detective,” helps you get results in as little as one week.
A licensed private investigator with three decades of experience, he cares about his clients. He helps his clients successfully cope with the reality of infidelity. “What I do in my practice and what I have designed this book to do,” says Mitchell, “is empower women to make decisions, based on fact, that are best for them.”
Whether your partner is starting to wander off or involved in a full-blown affair, it’s better to find out sooner rather than later--and on your terms. Mitchell’s book helps you stay in control, pace yourself, and get the proof you need through an easy, step-by-step action plan.
Mitchell and his work have been featured on the Fox News, Today Show, The Early Show, and Dr. Phil Show. He is heralded by the national media—Ladies Home Journal, Baltimore Sun, Esquire, Chicago Tribune, and more--for his cutting edge and compassionate approach to the crisis of adultery. Mitchell quickly uncovers the truth, wins courtroom decisions, brings closure, and rebuilds lives. The More You Know shows readers how to get the same breakthrough results with the techniques he uses every day.
If you’re living with the pain of not knowing, Mitchell shows you exactly how to quickly take charge of the situation and your life. You’ll learn: what relationships are most at risk, the eight most common warning signs, what to do first and why, insider techniques, investigative strategies that get answers, and--most importantly--how to recover emotionally, financially, and socially.
# # #
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Monday, January 5, 2009
The More You Know: Getting the Evidence and Support You Need to Investigate a Troubled Relationship
By Arlene Harder, MA, MFT
Review of The More You Know: Getting the Evidence and Support You Need to Investigate a Troubled Relationship
If you suspect your spouse is cheating on you, what can you do to prove or disprove your suspicions.
Affairs, whether lasting one night or several months, damage families even if one or both parties pretends it's not really serious, or that no one is hurt if it's kept secret.
At the very least, if a man is cheating on his wife, whether she doesn't know (or chooses not to see the signs of an affair going on right under her nose), she misses out on having an open and deeply committed relationship with the man she's chosen for a partner. He misses out on experiencing a marriage of faithfulness and honesty. Their children miss the opportunity to learn what a committed and loving relationship looks like.
In short, adultery ain't good for your marriage and you're probably reading this page because you have a nagging suspicion your spouse has strayed. But how can you know if your husband or wife is cheating on you (or your partner if you are in a supposedly committed relationship without a marriage license)? Furthermore, what can, and should, you do about your suspicions.?
Hiring a private detective to spy on your spouse is not an action most suspicious wives or husbands take. If they do hire an investigator, they don't do it lightly.
However, after reading The More You Know, you'll be much better prepared to recognize whether your spouse or partner is most likely cheating on you, what to do to protect yourself and your finances, and whether to hire a detective. The author, a private investigator and son of an FBI agent, offers a practical guide to approaching the possibility of an affair. He shares the many ways in which he has helped uncover and prove affairs in hundreds of couples he has seen over the years.
To set the stage for exploring infidelity, in the first chapter Bill Mitchell looks at what kinds of relationships are most at risk. Next, he gives eight signs of adultery. They are:
1. Defensive behavior
2. Changes in affection and sexual activity
3. Financial woes
4. Communication problems
5. Unexplained absences
6. Need to be alone
7. Pattern and lifestyle changes
8. Wardrobe renovation
Any of these, by itself, doesn't mean adultery is occurring or even right around the corner. But satisfying relationships are most often free of these characteristics (except, perhaps, the last, in which case a person may feel their natural sloppiness has prevented moving up the corporate ladder and decide to do something about it).
In any case, as you read examples of each of these, you can access the likelihood that cheating is taking place. You might also decide to take steps to change a rocky relationship so that an affair doesn't occur — for example, by reading and taking to heart suggestions in the articles here in Support4Change for strengthening your marriage to prevent future heartache.
Bill Mitchell's chapter on "Where it All Begins" offers a warning on how to avoid getting into a situation where the potential for an affair can grow into full-fledged adultery. Preventing adultery takes effort. For example, I have a neighbor who has a policy that he doesn't go to lunch alone with a women other than his wife. If there is business to discuss, he will do that in his office or he'll take someone else along to a lunch meeting. As a lawyer, he's seen too many cases of affairs that began very innocently, but concluded with ruined lives.
Of course, there are many places where lovers can rendezvous besides lunch. There are weekends and evenings (a time when investigators are most often hired to do surveillance), days when a spouse and co-worker are both not scheduled to work, before and after work, business trips, etc.
So let's assume you are fairly sure your spouse has been cheating on you, but you want to get proof. It would be nice if you could simply say, "Honey, Betty saw you with a blonde at that roadside cafe last Tuesday when you said you were working late at the office. Explain yourself." And then, in the better of all possible worlds (the best being a world in which no one cheated on anyone), your spouse would say, "I was just meeting with her to plan a very special event for your birthday." And you would believe him because he was telling the truth.
In another scenario he might say, "I've been having an affair for several months and intended to tell you but it slipped my mind. If it bothers you I won't do it again." Then you both kiss and that's the end of that. Yeah, sure. If he had an affair, he has a lot of damage to undo and you have a lot of exploring to see where you want to go from there.
However, given the fact that affairs occur in a climate of secrecy, if he is having an affair, the chances are that not only will he deny it, he'll be more cautious when he next meets with your competition. Further, once warned you're on to him, it's possible he may try to hide financial transactions, so that in a divorce settlement you won't get the money you deserve. A person who cheats by having sex with someone other than his wife is not beyond cheating with his finances.
Consider a case I heard in a lecture on divorce and negotiation in graduate school. The instructor was a woman lawyer who had been a therapist. Her story goes something like this. When her husband, we'll call him Joe, began divorce proceedings, he claimed the large amount of money in their bank account was a loan from his brother, Steve, his partner in business. Since he had to pay it back, he claimed it wasn't an asset.
To prove it was a loan, next to each deposit in the account book he had stamped the notation, "Loan to Joe from Steve." The same stamp appeared on each check Steve had written.
Unfortunately for Joe, his wife went through the drawers of his desk and found a receipt for the stamp used in both instances dated after he filed for divorce. Without that evidence, he could have gotten away with claiming he had much less than he did, and she would have gotten much less in the settlement. Deciding women needed help from jerks like that, she went to law school.
Anyway, back to my review of The More You Know. If you have doubts about your spouse's fidelity and want answers quickly, the book will give you good, practical advice on what you should do, which includes various ways to go beyond suspicions to getting proof.
Before I read this book, I hadn't recommended clients hire a private detective if cheating was suspected. We used therapy techniques that often eventually exposed adultery. However, I now see the advantage of hiring someone like Bill Mitchell.
If you do hire a professional investigator, you may not find evidence of your spouse's cheating in a week, which is the amount of time Bill is often able to gather the necessary proof.
Nevertheless, even if you don't choose to hire a professional, a person trained in surveillance can at least guide you in what you can do on your own. To help you find an investigator, the book includes a list of state agencies that license private investigators, for you wouldn't want to use one who wasn't licensed.
Setting out on the path of checking on a wayward spouse is painful. But it's not any less painful than not knowing the truth, for lies we tell and lies we believe too often destroy relationships beyond the point of repair. The truth may seem harsh if it is not what we want to know, but it's also liberating.
© Copyright 2006, Arlene Harder, MA, MFT
Review of The More You Know: Getting the Evidence and Support You Need to Investigate a Troubled Relationship
If you suspect your spouse is cheating on you, what can you do to prove or disprove your suspicions.
Affairs, whether lasting one night or several months, damage families even if one or both parties pretends it's not really serious, or that no one is hurt if it's kept secret.
At the very least, if a man is cheating on his wife, whether she doesn't know (or chooses not to see the signs of an affair going on right under her nose), she misses out on having an open and deeply committed relationship with the man she's chosen for a partner. He misses out on experiencing a marriage of faithfulness and honesty. Their children miss the opportunity to learn what a committed and loving relationship looks like.
In short, adultery ain't good for your marriage and you're probably reading this page because you have a nagging suspicion your spouse has strayed. But how can you know if your husband or wife is cheating on you (or your partner if you are in a supposedly committed relationship without a marriage license)? Furthermore, what can, and should, you do about your suspicions.?
Hiring a private detective to spy on your spouse is not an action most suspicious wives or husbands take. If they do hire an investigator, they don't do it lightly.
However, after reading The More You Know, you'll be much better prepared to recognize whether your spouse or partner is most likely cheating on you, what to do to protect yourself and your finances, and whether to hire a detective. The author, a private investigator and son of an FBI agent, offers a practical guide to approaching the possibility of an affair. He shares the many ways in which he has helped uncover and prove affairs in hundreds of couples he has seen over the years.
To set the stage for exploring infidelity, in the first chapter Bill Mitchell looks at what kinds of relationships are most at risk. Next, he gives eight signs of adultery. They are:
1. Defensive behavior
2. Changes in affection and sexual activity
3. Financial woes
4. Communication problems
5. Unexplained absences
6. Need to be alone
7. Pattern and lifestyle changes
8. Wardrobe renovation
Any of these, by itself, doesn't mean adultery is occurring or even right around the corner. But satisfying relationships are most often free of these characteristics (except, perhaps, the last, in which case a person may feel their natural sloppiness has prevented moving up the corporate ladder and decide to do something about it).
In any case, as you read examples of each of these, you can access the likelihood that cheating is taking place. You might also decide to take steps to change a rocky relationship so that an affair doesn't occur — for example, by reading and taking to heart suggestions in the articles here in Support4Change for strengthening your marriage to prevent future heartache.
Bill Mitchell's chapter on "Where it All Begins" offers a warning on how to avoid getting into a situation where the potential for an affair can grow into full-fledged adultery. Preventing adultery takes effort. For example, I have a neighbor who has a policy that he doesn't go to lunch alone with a women other than his wife. If there is business to discuss, he will do that in his office or he'll take someone else along to a lunch meeting. As a lawyer, he's seen too many cases of affairs that began very innocently, but concluded with ruined lives.
Of course, there are many places where lovers can rendezvous besides lunch. There are weekends and evenings (a time when investigators are most often hired to do surveillance), days when a spouse and co-worker are both not scheduled to work, before and after work, business trips, etc.
So let's assume you are fairly sure your spouse has been cheating on you, but you want to get proof. It would be nice if you could simply say, "Honey, Betty saw you with a blonde at that roadside cafe last Tuesday when you said you were working late at the office. Explain yourself." And then, in the better of all possible worlds (the best being a world in which no one cheated on anyone), your spouse would say, "I was just meeting with her to plan a very special event for your birthday." And you would believe him because he was telling the truth.
In another scenario he might say, "I've been having an affair for several months and intended to tell you but it slipped my mind. If it bothers you I won't do it again." Then you both kiss and that's the end of that. Yeah, sure. If he had an affair, he has a lot of damage to undo and you have a lot of exploring to see where you want to go from there.
However, given the fact that affairs occur in a climate of secrecy, if he is having an affair, the chances are that not only will he deny it, he'll be more cautious when he next meets with your competition. Further, once warned you're on to him, it's possible he may try to hide financial transactions, so that in a divorce settlement you won't get the money you deserve. A person who cheats by having sex with someone other than his wife is not beyond cheating with his finances.
Consider a case I heard in a lecture on divorce and negotiation in graduate school. The instructor was a woman lawyer who had been a therapist. Her story goes something like this. When her husband, we'll call him Joe, began divorce proceedings, he claimed the large amount of money in their bank account was a loan from his brother, Steve, his partner in business. Since he had to pay it back, he claimed it wasn't an asset.
To prove it was a loan, next to each deposit in the account book he had stamped the notation, "Loan to Joe from Steve." The same stamp appeared on each check Steve had written.
Unfortunately for Joe, his wife went through the drawers of his desk and found a receipt for the stamp used in both instances dated after he filed for divorce. Without that evidence, he could have gotten away with claiming he had much less than he did, and she would have gotten much less in the settlement. Deciding women needed help from jerks like that, she went to law school.
Anyway, back to my review of The More You Know. If you have doubts about your spouse's fidelity and want answers quickly, the book will give you good, practical advice on what you should do, which includes various ways to go beyond suspicions to getting proof.
Before I read this book, I hadn't recommended clients hire a private detective if cheating was suspected. We used therapy techniques that often eventually exposed adultery. However, I now see the advantage of hiring someone like Bill Mitchell.
If you do hire a professional investigator, you may not find evidence of your spouse's cheating in a week, which is the amount of time Bill is often able to gather the necessary proof.
Nevertheless, even if you don't choose to hire a professional, a person trained in surveillance can at least guide you in what you can do on your own. To help you find an investigator, the book includes a list of state agencies that license private investigators, for you wouldn't want to use one who wasn't licensed.
Setting out on the path of checking on a wayward spouse is painful. But it's not any less painful than not knowing the truth, for lies we tell and lies we believe too often destroy relationships beyond the point of repair. The truth may seem harsh if it is not what we want to know, but it's also liberating.
© Copyright 2006, Arlene Harder, MA, MFT
Monday, December 15, 2008
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Investigating an Affair
Domestic Relations Investigations require answers to these questions:
1. What is your relationship to the subject?
2. What is the length of your marriage or relationship?
3. When did you become suspicious?
4. What signs of adultery were observed?
5. Do you know who is involved?
6. Do you currently reside with your spouse or partner?
7. Do you have children by this relationship?
8. Can you provide us with recent photographs of your spouse or partner?
9. Who is your spouse's/partner's employer? (Provide details, address, phone#s, scheduled hours, etc.)
10. Identify vehicles used by your spouse/partner that might be observed during surveillance efforts?
11. Does your spouse/partner have a record of violence -(verbal/physical)?
12. Has your spouse/partner have any criminal history?
13. Have you engaged another investigative firm/agency with respect to your spouse/partner? 14. Are personal home computer(s) used that are considered "family owned"?
15. Does your spouse or partner have IM, Chat or Email accounts?
16. Compile a list of internet activities, websites, social networking sites, online games, MMOs) or forum sites your spouse frequents: (i.e., Facebook, MySpace, Friendster, Second Life, Orkut, Porsche Forum, etc.)
17. Has anyone conducting surveillance efforts before approaching our firm?
18. Do you know the dates and times that would be best to initiate an investigation and surveillance?
19. Explain your actions to investigate your suspicions?
20. Have you employed any electronic measures or equipment?
21. Will you be using evidence collected as grounds for divorce, child custody or other reasons? 22. How did you find our investigative firm or were you referred by someone?
NOTE: Depending on the extent of investigative services needed budgets vary. Do you have a budget estimate in mind?
1. What is your relationship to the subject?
2. What is the length of your marriage or relationship?
3. When did you become suspicious?
4. What signs of adultery were observed?
5. Do you know who is involved?
6. Do you currently reside with your spouse or partner?
7. Do you have children by this relationship?
8. Can you provide us with recent photographs of your spouse or partner?
9. Who is your spouse's/partner's employer? (Provide details, address, phone#s, scheduled hours, etc.)
10. Identify vehicles used by your spouse/partner that might be observed during surveillance efforts?
11. Does your spouse/partner have a record of violence -(verbal/physical)?
12. Has your spouse/partner have any criminal history?
13. Have you engaged another investigative firm/agency with respect to your spouse/partner? 14. Are personal home computer(s) used that are considered "family owned"?
15. Does your spouse or partner have IM, Chat or Email accounts?
16. Compile a list of internet activities, websites, social networking sites, online games, MMOs) or forum sites your spouse frequents: (i.e., Facebook, MySpace, Friendster, Second Life, Orkut, Porsche Forum, etc.)
17. Has anyone conducting surveillance efforts before approaching our firm?
18. Do you know the dates and times that would be best to initiate an investigation and surveillance?
19. Explain your actions to investigate your suspicions?
20. Have you employed any electronic measures or equipment?
21. Will you be using evidence collected as grounds for divorce, child custody or other reasons? 22. How did you find our investigative firm or were you referred by someone?
NOTE: Depending on the extent of investigative services needed budgets vary. Do you have a budget estimate in mind?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
